Radical repentance looks like this.
Stopping dead in your tracks and letting conviction flood deeply through all you are. Anguish takes a hold of your rebellion and turns any pride into humility, as we stare directly into Gods holiness. Then we open our hearts ears and our physical mouths and confess bluntly and completely. Not hiding. Not deceiving our own hearts, but straight forward “I am a sinner forgive me” The ears of our hearts need to hear these things. Because the more it hears these things, the more it will change.
As we confess, we turn our anguish into deep hope and celebration and revelation of the fathers love and forgiveness. Awash with rescued relief, we dance in grace and peace. This is the life of repentance. This is when we are given the gift of space to repent, to turn, to renew, to try again, to pick a different road. This is when we rebuild. When we evaluate what the wick was and to avoid even being near it, let alone lighting it. We reveal secret tunnels to our brothers, we hold up warning signs and the reality of who we are below the surface, behind closed doors, the machinations of our minds, our internal body cocks.
We can repent smart, with wisdom, knowing we are fallible, that we love our sin. Or we can repent ignorantly, knowing that we will sin so why bother, sabotaging our own repentance moments after the anguish has lifted.
So sometimes we need to return to hopefully anguish, joyful mourning of the passing old man. For one doesn’t mourn a man who will be resurrected, but one that will die and stay dead, as needs to be our sin.
After building our repentance and firmly planting our feet on the new road, we head off in the relieve blessed hope, determined to love and play with the father, excitedly. Radical repentance changes the future too