An unfinished thought.
I have been thinking and reading a few things of late that have made it difficult to dream of where I was going. Like i was on a road trip, determined to make it to a specific place to enjoy a forest and suddenly… all plans changed. We ran out of petrol, one of the wheels fell off, but the road we stopped on, is so peaceful, so engaging, that I stopped thinking about the destination.
So in the midst of this… delay, I sat with a genius yesterday, in the middle of a city park in the midst of a town festival we were playing music at, in the middle of the country I currently call home. And dreams started connecting again. Days earlier I had journaled in Lithuanian about the deepest desires of my heart. And the day before I had spoken with another Lithuanian genius about how community could change a capital city and here, in this park, we began speaking about attitudinal redemption. How if one concludes that domestic violence is not god for the structure of solid communities how does one gracefully and powerfully communicate a better way, a more life filled way, to build into the next generation a healthier way to treat each of their intimate relationships.
But it is such a complicated idea because, who has the right to tell another that their way of intimately loving another is wrong. Especially if the outsider has nothing to do with that intimate union. And yes, maybe we have family we can talk through a better way of honouring another, but, in a country that sees a high percentage of domestic violence, how do you salve such destruction en masse?
As we spoke more, it came clear that, it cannot be an en masse solution at first. These problems have usually come from intimate one on one interactions that have festered inside of us, never checked by those outside of our heads and have then manifested in behaviours once again left unchecked.
And thats where our conversation met a wall.
What is a world with unchecked behaviour?
Social construct is based on the tension between knowing what is expected, and consequence based knowledge of what is unexpected. But familial constructs of these are different. And can be oppressively so, or, in the case of many home schooled individuals, liberatingly so.
But, how does the wider community affect change in those who have decided or have been trained to think in destructive ways?
In a social experiment like the soviet union, or in the aftermath of the Cambodian genocide or in the midst of ideological oppression, sometimes our most innocent or immature can be affected in ways that are unseen at first. Trained by the struggled, given examples of life in stress. and then put into the stressful rhythms of “normal” life, that some of us with “normal” upbringings even struggle with. and so on and so on.
So for example we spoke of domestic violence. A subject I know nothing about. An injustice that hasn’t touched my life in any form. But an oppressive decision made by the powerful to hurt the less powerful through manipulation and violence. That has made terrible inroads in my home country and others around.
Good communication fixes all. And sometimes good communication is words, sometimes with physical presence and at other times good communication is physical action. But which, and how much, and is there a fix-all.
I would argue that there isn’t. There isn’t a fix all, in any sense of the word for any problems such as this.